Warning Signs and Education
Know the warning signs of an abusive relationship
Does your partner:
- “Track” all your time?
- Regularly accuse you of being unfaithful?
- Isolate you from working or attending school?
- Prevent you from working or attending school?
- Criticize you for little things?
- Get angry if you refuse sex?
- Get out of control when drinking or on drugs?
- Control the money and badger you to account for any that you spend?
- Embarrass you in public or private?
- Physically abuse you or your children?
- Intentionally destroy your belongings or things that you treasure?
- Threaten to use a weapon against you?
- Threaten to take your children?
Do you:
- Sometimes feel scared of how your partner will act?
- Constantly make excuses to other people for your partner’s behavior?
- Believe that you can help your partner change if only you changed something about yourself?
- Feel like no matter what you do, your partner is never happy with you?
- Stay with your partner because you are afraid of what your partner would do if you broke up?
If you answered “yes” to these questions, call the Harbor House Hotline for help. Harbor House is staffed 24 hours/day, 7 days/week, 365 days/year, and is available to assist you at any time.
Harbor House Hotline
Call if you feel unsafe in your relationship or worry about your or your children’s safety.
Restraining Orders
Do you need a protection order
If there is a clear safety concern, repeated harassment or any incident causing fear for personal safety, you may consider filing for a restraining order to protect you and your children.
How to file for a protection order
- File online from anywhere, using any device at the Kansas Protection Order Portal (KSPOP) at https://kspop.gov.
- In Sedgwick County, you may also file in person by visiting the Protection Order Office on the first floor of the Sedgwick County District Courthouse at 525 N. Main. The office assists with both Protection From Abuse (PFA) and Protection From Stalking (PFS) orders. You can contact the office directly at (316) 660-5704 to speak with an advocate.
Whether you’re filing in person or online, the process is straightforward.
Advocates at Harbor House can help you navigate the process and access helpful resources along the way.
The Truth About Domestic Violence
Domestic violence is never okay in any relationship
Domestic violence doesn’t discriminate.
Abuse can happen to anyone, regardless of race, socioeconomic status, relationship type or background. Although most victims of domestic violence are women, men can be abused, too. If you feel threatened or fear for your safety, you may be in an abusive relationship—even if you’ve often rationalized or dismissed the harmful behavior in the past. Recognizing that abusive behavior is never justified is the first step toward breaking free.
Domestic violence is about power and control.
Domestic violence occurs within a family or an intimate relationship as a way for one person to control another.
Domestic violence looks like:
- Manipulating through intimidation, blame, gaslighting and isolation.
- Physical abuse—hitting, punching, kicking or assaulting another person.
- Not allowing someone to leave home.
- Using objects like knives and guns to cause injury.
- Harming someone emotionally by threats, name-calling and put-downs.
Domestic violence hurts everyone.
Living in a home where one parent uses violence against the other places children at risk for emotional and behavioral problems, like:
- Feeling confused
- Wetting the bed
- Being unable to sleep
- Having trouble in school
- Blaming themselves for the violence
Children who witness domestic violence or who are targets of it are more likely to become abusers themselves. National studies show that children who are abused or witness domestic violence have a 53% higher likelihood of juvenile arrest and a 38% increased risk of arrest for violent crimes as adults.1
Domestic violence and sexual assault occurs every day in our community. If you or someone you know is concerned about their relationship, please call Harbor House and let us help.”
Keri McGregor, Program Director
Harbor House
Spread Advocacy
Harbor House provides advocacy and education to prevent domestic violence
Safety
We offer planning and support services for domestic violence survivors working towards their safety goals while living in the community.
Services are available through a single consultation or ongoing case management. This advocacy choice may be the best option for individuals who do not wish to commit to a full program.
Education
We provide education opportunities for professionals and the public about domestic violence.
Standard topics include domestic violence basics, effects of domestic violence on health, effects of trauma and tips for talking with survivors. Other topics specific to your group or audience can be addressed upon request; please don’t hesitate to ask. We make these presentations available for any group size without a fee.
Presentation requests
For presentation requests, please send a message via the contact form below.
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This grant project is supported by sub-grant member 17-VAWA-14 awarded through the Federal Office on Violence Against Women as administered by the Kansas Governor’s Grant Program. The opinions, findings, conclusions, or recommendations expressed in this publication or exhibition are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Office of the Kansas Governor or the U.S. Department of Justice.
1 Widom, C.S., “The Cycle of Violence,” (Research in Brief), National Institute of Justice, U.S. Department of Justice, 1992.